You are a women and hate your brother and your mother dies should you let your brother's son carry the casket?

Please weigh in as my Aunt (who had power of attorney over my grandmother) did not ask me to carry the casket. I always got along with my grandmother and Aunt, but perhaps I didn't see my grandmother as much as I should have (maybe only a few times a year) even though we live close. My Aunt didn't ask me because she hates her brother (my dad) and she didn't want our side of the family represented. (But why?) When someone dies shouldn't the whole family be represented no matter what? Should I forgive my Aunt? Or is my Aunt a (#%^*) ? How can she justify this? At the funeral my Aunt told me that she loves me, but does she? Oh Ya, there is one last piece of info... My Aunt did not tell anyone (other then her side of the family) about her condition, when she was dying in the hospital (4 days). I only found out after she died. My Aunt says my grandmother didn't want to see anyone (but my grandmother has dementia) What can/should I do, why is my Aunt so cruel? Or does she have a point?